That girl with the gimpy face.

Today is the inspection and appraisal on our house-to-be. I should be insanely anxious and nervous today, but for some reason, I’m not. I just have this calm feeling like “whatever happens, happens.” Of course, I’ll be thrilled to get a phone call letting me know what the results are, but until then, I’m not worried. I’m not sure if that is a good sign, or just a sign that I am so totally over it already.

Then again, some of it could have to do with the fact that my face is 50% numb right now. Yes I, the woman with the most perfect teeth in the world, got cavities for the first time. I’m 30 years old, and I have my first fucking cavity. Four of them, to be exact. I went to get fillings today. I was scared, but figured I was just being a big baby like I usually am, and it wouldn’t really be that big of a deal. Well, it was every bit as horrific as I had feared. I dealt with the Novocaine injection okay…I squirmed and clenched my fists and thrashed my feet, but it was bearable. But when he started drilling and I FELT IT in one of my teeth, the party was over. I couldn’t relax after that, even after he gave me more Novocaine. I couldn’t stop shaking, and my jaw ached (it still aches, 3 hours later) from stretching my tiny little mouth wider than it can possibly go. (I have a little mouth, seriously. Two people should not be able to fit both their hands in my mouth at one time.) Poor little me. I can’t imagine a child having to deal with this. I will be the Toothbrush Nazi when I have children. They will hate me…but believe me – IT IS FOR THEIR OWN GOOD.

Over all, it only took 45 minutes, but I have never been SO glad to get out of there. My happy, cheerful feelings towards my dentist cease to exist. And to think I PAID them to do that to me! Maybe I should have said yes to the laughing gas….but it costs a dollar a minute. I thought I was stronger than I am and turned it down, but now I am realizing that it SO would have been worth it.

My upper lip is so gimpy I can hardly drink water, much less try to eat a snack. And get this – when I smile, I look more like my friend J than I look like myself. Not that she isn’t a beautiful girl, but she doesn’t look a thing like me. In the meantime, I am trying not to laugh or smile. But if I get a phone call with happy inspection results…you better bet I will be smiling with J’s smile!


~ by beyondalice on July 7, 2009.

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